Fatty, Fatty, Two-by-Four

Here I sit, literally ripping on my hair wondering if I actually have the balls to document this journey. Weight loss. How tired and worn out. Flip on any channel on TV and see some chubby person sweating profusely, gagging up bile or being squeezed into Spanx to look skinnier. Yo-yo dieting is an American profession with Oprah as CEO. But yet, here I am trying adamantly to lose "baby weight" that most people think refers to my eight-month old son, but really refers to this fat little imp in my brain that I was born with. The one that tells you you can't do it, that you're too fat, that you'll look like a deflated elephant even if you were to lose the weight, that you're husband doesn't deserve your cellulite and saggy skin, that your kids are going to get teased because their mom is Fatty, Fatty Two-By-Four...Oh, I have thought it all.

So, bottom line? I am going to be honest with myself through this blog. I am going to document the ugly parts, the funny parts, the embarrassing parts, the parts that most women think they are alone on (at least I hope there's more people like me out there!).

Here are the Stats to date:

Starting weight as of January 1st: 325 pounds (I am literally about to breathe into a bag I am near hyperventilation just typing that)

Weight today: 310 pounds (achieved my first goal of being at the weight I was before I got pregnant)

Next goal: 299 (not only because it gets me out of the ugliest number imaginable, but because that was the weight I was at in college when I started Weight Watchers and lost 75 pounds)